Best Advice for Planning a Wedding: 3 Things to Do First

3 Wedding Planning Tips for a calmer start

You just got engaged. Congratulations – now put the planning down for a moment.

Seriously. Before you open a single wedding planning spreadsheet or start a Pinterest board or ask anyone’s opinion about anything – just enjoy being engaged for a bit. This season doesn’t last long and the planning will still be there next week.

Right. Now we can talk about where to actually start.

I’m a Shropshire wedding photographer and I’ve been photographing weddings since 2016. I’ve watched hundreds of couples plan their days – some with ease, some with a level of stress that made the whole thing feel like a second job. The difference usually comes down to a few fundamentals that either get done early or don’t get done at all.

Here are the three I’d start with.

1. Sort your budget before you book anything

Sit down together, just the two of you, and agree a realistic total budget before you speak to a single supplier. That means everything: the wedding itself, the honeymoon, the hen and stag, the outfits, the extras that always appear from nowhere.

Then split it by priority. What matters most to you both? Start there and work down.

The venue usually takes the biggest chunk – and venue costs are heavily influenced by guest numbers, time of year, and location. Which brings me to tip two.

One thing I’d add that often gets missed: build in a buffer. Something always costs more than you expected. Having 10% held back for the unexpected means you’re not making stressful decisions later.

2. Sort your guest list early – and be ruthless

Your guest list and your budget are completely intertwined. More guests means a bigger venue, more catering, more everything. If you’re working to a fixed budget, your guest list is often the most powerful lever you have.

Write out everyone you’d want there with no filter. Then cull. Then cull again. Keep going until you’re left with the people who genuinely matter – the ones you’d be sad not to have in the room, not the ones you feel obligated to invite.

It’s one of the harder conversations in wedding planning but having it early saves a lot of pain later. A smaller guest list often means a better wedding – more budget per head, more time with the people you actually love, a day that feels like you.

→ Tips for downsizing your wedding without losing what matters

3. Get organised with a spreadsheet – and keep it updated

I know, I know. But genuinely… a simple spreadsheet will save your sanity.

List every supplier you need, with columns for: who you’ve contacted, their quote, whether they’re booked, their contact details, the deposit paid, the balance outstanding and when it’s due, and what information they need from you and by when.

Add your guest list on a second tab with addresses and emails for save the dates and invitations. Keep a running total of what you’ve spent so you can see where you are against budget at any point.

It sounds basic but the couples who have this in place from the start are consistently calmer throughout the whole process.

The thing I’d add from my own experience

This isn’t in any planning guide I’ve ever read – but after nearly a decade of photographing weddings I’d say it’s the most important thing:

Plan to mingle, not to cram things in.

The couples who look the most relaxed and have the most fun on their wedding day are the ones who built space into their day – not the ones who tried to fit everything in. Every additional element (extra venue, extra tradition, extra performance) takes time. And time is the one thing you can’t get back on your wedding day.

Before you add anything to your day, ask: does this give us more time with our guests, or does it take it away?

→ Why time is the most important thing to think about when planning your wedding day

Want to go deeper?

I had a great conversation about wedding planning with London wedding planner Ann Nicholas – you can watch the full interview on YouTube if you want more detail on the guest list and budget conversations specifically. It’s about 45 minutes so worth settling in with a drink.